Never Burn Bridges...

In the Spring of 2009, I attended a conference in NYC for my company that ended up to be a very interesting evening.

I was being introduced to a company that wanted me and my team to raise capital for them. And when a company asks you to raise capital, there's a woo'ing process. So of course, right after dinner, we went downstairs into the heart of Times Square and there sat a white limo.

I smoked a cigarette right before I was about to jump in the limo and everyone was making small talk. Out of nowhere, some wannabe guido sporting the flashy cheap suit stumbles out of the revolving door obviously drunk. He walks right over to one of the owners of my firm and says "who are these guys and where are you guys heading?" Easy enough, the owner says "**** Investments and they're taking us out because they want to meet Ray" to which he replies "i'm coming!" The owner, Glen says "no" almost immediately and the drunk who we'll call Chris walks right over to the regional VP of the company we're meeting and says "i'm coming, i'll raise a million dollars for you.. in fact I've already raised 500k in the past." Glen pulls him to the side and tells him not to come again and he walks a few feet away.

We proceed to enter the limo and as the door is closing, it's jerked open and in jumps Chris! He starts pouring drinks and getting rude. Meanwhile, I'm sitting quiet because I'm still new to the company.

Get to the VIP table of the bar and this guy is now causing a ruckus! Grabbing at waitresses and throwing ice at people on the floor. He walks away for a while and I see someone I know who sits at our table just to say hello... out of nowhere this guy is standing on the ledge above me and jumps off landing on my friend's lap who doesn't get mad at all, she just slides over. I ask him to move and he stands up and the conversation runs like this:

chris: "is that your girlfriend?"
me: "nope"
chris: "are you fucking her?"
me: "no"
chris: "then who gives a fuck, she's just an asian whore!"
me: "now you're being racist. she's an old friend of mine who I just happened to see and you landed on her jumping off the ledge. who does that?"
chris: "by the way, who the fuck are you?!"
me: "it doesn't matter."
chris: "that's rude. i asked your name, the polite thing to do would be to answer"
me: "i'm rude? that's funny. i don't need to give you my name because I don't expect we'll be doing too much talking."
chris: "wait... you're asian! are you Henry or Tom Kelly or one of them new guys with Tom Kelly?! cuz they're the only people makin money at the NY branch so if you ain't Henry or one of them, you ain't shit. I make 100k gross a month and I'll have you fired tomorrow."
me: "it doesn't really matter"

At this point I look at the branch owner who runs the LI branch where this guy works and I yell out to him, "Don, control your fucking dog. This is how you run your office?!" After that, I walked out and went back to my hotel.

Next day, news broke out and this guy wasn't allowed in the NY branch anymore. LOL i also found out he does no where near 100k in gross... 25 if he's lucky!

Since then, news has spread across the branches about the success of my team and people from the Long Island branch have requested to sit down and learn from us.

First person that walks in, our drunk friend, Chris.. I stand up and I look at the owner of my firm, "ANYONE BUT THIS MOTHERFUKER"... my boss replies "c'mon!! let it be".. i say plainly, "i'm walking out, let me know when this guy isn't here anymore and i'll come back"

The week after, another guy walks in, it's this fuckin guy Chris' junior partner wearing a custom suit that looks like it was made for the Joker and a Louis Vuitton briefcase... again I say "DIDN'T I SAY I DON'T WANT THIS FUCKIN GUY AROUND?!" to which i hear "but that's not him!" "ITS STILL SOMEONE ASSOCIATED WITH HIM!"

I kept quiet during our small encounter that night and I was humble about it but I don't let people off the hook when I hold a grudge. If this guy was on fire, I wouldn't piss on him.

Point is, Don't burn bridges! And don't tell tall tales! Cuz eventually you'll be burning a bridge that you may NEED to cross!

SOOOO I JUS STARTED A NEW BLOG

the reason I got into this whole blog thing was to inspire people our age ... when i first got the idea, i didnt want to write just about myself... i wanted to give financial advice to young professionals! well here it is.. follow me on simplecommoncents.blogspot.com! see u there!

Fabulous Wedding!

On June 19th, I went to the wedding of one of my closest friends, Johanna... I have to say this was the wedding of weddings... no expenses spared... reception was held at the Brooklyn Museum with full on cocktail hour downstairs followed by an elevator ride to the main hall. Amazing!

This was a nerve racking wedding for me to show up to because I knew that the guestlist to this event was just like the venue, high-end. You had Dr. and Dr. Smith's walking all over the place. Lawyers, nurses and here I am... last time I met my friend's family I was nothing but the teenager bummin around moving from friend's home to friend's home in Bushwick!

There was a conversation that commenced at our table where people were talking about their schools and I had said "oh yea you were in the Filipino Club right? I met you during Barrio Fiesta" to which she replied, "what school did you go to?"... I'm always embarassed to hear the question because I feel more embarassed to answer it, "i didn't." It's always a humbling experience when it happens.

Anyway, I thought it was an amazing wedding and one I would remember.

Best Reason to Watch Twilight

Preview of the House

Why is this chick rockin such a big bikini?!?!

Sorry Guys, She's Married Now!

damn guess she realized that she can't be a movie star so she made sure to marry her backup plan!

Spontaneous

I really don't want to forget this so I will post it..

My boy BJ is having his bachelor party this weekend in Miami... i've known for a few months now and I originally planned to go. In planning, I told Kim that since I was going away, she should go away too! So for Mother's Day, I booked a trip for her and Tyler to go on a cruise to the Bahamas. All this before I planned on buying a house.

Since I was buying a house and there were a ton of unexpected expenses, I decided no Miami for me!

Fast forward to June 25th, Kim gets on a plane to Miami to board the cruiseliner to the Bahamas and I go to BJ's bbq for Pwee and everyone at the BBQ is talking about the big trip to Miami... of course, I get a lil envious and I look over at Jerry and I just say plainly, "wanna go to Miami?" . . . right there, we bought tickets to go to Miami staying at the same hotel... I couldn't tell my wife cuz she was already in the Bahamas with no phone and instead she could only read about it when she got back on Monday.

So yeah! Spontaneous but at least it makes you feel alive!

If You're Not Growing, You're Dying.

I look down at my row and what started with 4 desks filled has now become a full row of 12... To top it off I have another kid(as in worker, not baby) on the way.

My business partner called me up about 15 minutes ago and he said he was at the Home Depot with Uncle Dennis and he was giving him the update on what's been going on with me. He said to me, "I started thinking about it and I realized 2 years ago, we got there and you had nothing but a phone and now you're sitting managing a huge team and no one can do it better... stay level and stay focused and keep it going... I'm proud of you"

Now I'm thinking about it and he's exactly right. Two years ago on May 28th, I came here with absolutely nothing but knowledge and the dark fear in the back of my mind that I wouldn't just let myself down if I failed but I would let my new wife and my first born son down if I did not succeed.

There were tons of times during that time frame that I thought to myself, I can't believe I'm subjecting my wife and son through this. We moved from apt to apt to apt to apt to apt to apt to apt... Really bad memories stem from some of these places... eating habits were just terrible and my car situation was just bad. I went from driving my newly leased SE-R to nothing to a 96 Acura Integra in PURPLE to a 2002 BMW 3 series back to my SE-R until I got my first financed BMW 3 series in crimson RED. I still remember bringing that home... Kim never even came with me to the dealership, my credit couldn't suffice so I had to throw 15,000 down on the car!!! The fact that I had it just felt good on its own and the feeling of accomplishment even better. I brought it home nearly in tears realizing that my hard work was now coming together.
I remember moving to Leonia, NJ from the shittiest 2 bedroom railroad in Brooklyn and telling Kim, "just give me one more year, Babe. I'll make this happen..."

A few months after that summer that I got the red Beamer, we moved to a beautiful 2 br 2 bthrm condo in an elevator building in Hoboken! All the amenities you could imagine... and I told Kim, "this is the last move, I'm giving you the place that you wanted and love and that's it!!!!"

In February 2010, I went to the Philippines to visit my family and everytime I go I am inspired by my uncle who has always been a pinnacle of hope for me. When I was young, I was the black sheep of the family and everyone swore I would be a failure in anything I did but he always told me I could become great. Anyway... thats another story! But whenever I'm with him we talk about the future and money and retirement and I was inspired once again to work hard and retire in the Philippines. So as soon as I got back to New York, the first thing I did was hung out with my longest standing childhood friend and confidante, Jerry. I told him what was going on and he said to me, "watch HGTV, they have shows called House Hunters that would be really cool for you" I said to him, "not here! In the Philippines!!! I don't want to live here" and he just did his usual, "okay! but I watch these shows and I would love to but can't but you can!" So i watched it and through these I was interested but not SOLD on the idea! Not until 2 months later in April.

April 11th, 2010 marked my revelation: My accountant does my return and looks at me and says "two things so you won't have such a heavy tax bill next year, 1)buy a house 2) lease your car"

Simple enough, on April 11th he told me this.. On April 13th, I bought a car over the phone for the first time. Conversation in a nutshell, "Hi Laura, I spoke to you briefly before about a top of the line 2010 BMW 535 with all wheel drive. Do you have one?" Laura, "yes, would you like to come in for a test drive?" me, "no, I'd like to lease it and I want to make my monthly payment as high as possible, can you do that?" Laura a little startled, "umm... okay" "done"

May 11th, I asked Kim to look at a bunch of listings on Trulia.com and she kept showing me a particular house amongst the 100 or so listings we were looking over... the next day, we met with Tom's realtor, Fran and she just kept insisting that Kim and I see a house she thinks we'd love. Get to the place, doesn't look like much at first sight but as soon as we walk in, it's the same house Kim kept showing me... We were under contract in about a week, we are closing on the 15th... Sounds easy right? But the house buying process was one of the most stressful periods of my life and I wouldn't want to go through that again but I will talk about that more in a separate entry of its own...

The point of this entry:

Stay level headed and focused. I know what I have to do and I know where I want to be. Someone once told me that in this business, if you're not growing, you're dying. It stuck with me. Dreams are a window into what tomorrow will bring.

"I've failed over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." - Michael Jordan

My Greatest Downfall Became My Greatest Opportunity

In July of 2007, I received the best news I could have ever heard: "Babe, I'm pregnant."

A wild series of emotions swept through me.. happiness and anxiety are the two that stand out most. Not once did I tell myself, I don't want to go through this... Everything inside me told me that I would have to become a father.

At the time, I worked for a boutique firm just coasting through work... I wasn't growing at all, I was making enough money to have simple luxuries but not enough to support a family the way I want to live life.

So I made a phonecall to my friend, John who worked at the firm where I first became a broker, First Republic Group and I had myself set up with my old team who originally had screwed me over to begin with but I gave them the benefit of the doubt since at the time, I felt it was my only option.

A few months went by and I was doing exceptionally well, I was actually doing better than I'd ever done in my career in years prior. I remember the night of the firm Christmas party, instead of joining in the festivities and leaving work early like all my colleagues, I sat at my desk and I dialled the phone. Party started at 8, I walked in at 9:30. So here I am with my beautiful wife who was at the time 7 months pregnant and everyone from the bottom to the top would chat up my wife and tell her how well I was doing...

January came about and there was something going on at the firm... people were being taken to back rooms to work out "new" deals. When one person told me what was happening, I offered my advice and that person went back to the scumbags who ran the team who in turn, fired me.

This is now 3 weeks before Kim was scheduled to give birth. So out of fear, I spoke to a colleague of mine who I have great respect for, Tom Kelly. He was furious at what had happened and called his friend who was a recruiter for brokerage firms who immediately linked me with Chicago Investment Group.

I started off on a great note, I was moving clients over and opening new accounts and after about a week there, my son was born, Tyler Beckham.I would spend time in the hospital with Kim and Tyler and tell them everything would be okay and that I was in a good place.

A few weeks later, I received a call from the same kid I helped in the first place who caused my termination. He was out of a job as well so he said. I immediately brought him in since I felt bad and worked out a great deal for him. While i was sitting in meetings discussing his deal, he was outside in his designated seat right next to mine. I walked back to my desk and saw that he wasn't there and that my desk was empty! He robbed me!

Immediately after that, I received calls from people at FRG telling me that the kid was back there and was sitting with the scumbags in a closed door meeting. My new firm started receiving phone calls from lawyers threatening to sue and press charges against me and because of it, CIG let me go. Their words exactly, "These guys are vindictive and want you out of the business. We can't deal with corporate espionage and have to let you go but we will refer you to another firm." From there, I went to a small shop called Rockwell Securities.

This place was a tiny little mess. The guys who ran it thought they were masters of the universe and could run their midget firm better than anyone else. It was hell but regardless, I did well in the short time I was there.

About three weeks after starting at Rockwell, I received a call from TK, "we left First Republic, we're going to a place called National and we want you on board.. you in?"

"i'm in."

first entry

I've been wanting to create a blog of some sort where I can just share thoughts and vent about life. I've had so many thoughts and emotions in the last year and a half which I can remember but I wish I could re-live. I think the only way to do that would be to jot down what I have in this.

I wish I could turn back time and talk to my past self and tell him that everything would work out. In the same sense, I'd like to turn time forward and see what I become.

But I guess the only way to actually lock up memories forever is through some kind of media whether it be a simple picture, a video or words on paper. I'm gonna run with words.

Over the next few weeks until I've fully caught up, I'm going to write about all my past experiences to the best of my recollection. I want to remember my hardships, my inspirations, my success and failures... I'd like to relive it all because so far, the results have been sweet.

You can follow me if you 'd like...